it seems to me if you can't trust, you can't be trusted.

something's going on in my head right now, and i can't really put my finger on it. but that would require drills and holes and brain dammage, so never mind.

i'm doing something. finally. i talk about being remembered or doing important things, or making a difference, or being politically active, but i never follow through. for once i think i'm going to. on thursday i'm going to be nominated for Vice President of the College Democrats for the 2006-2007 school year. i don't know if it will be a contested race or not. i haven't heard anything yet. but both rick and jared have told me it's a good idea. i don't know. what do you think? can i pull this off? if i am running against someone else, what makes me think i'm a better candidate, that i could do this? all things i need to think about before thursday.

i'm scared.

i've never wanted anything like this.

or like the other thing, but that's a different story that i don't want to tell right now. too many people know. i don't like it. secrets are better. don't you agree?

sunday was the best day ever. it made me forget all about friday. 3 years is a long time to hold on to things like that. maybe tom was right when he yelled at me. more things to think about.

so what's everyone else thinking about this week (non school related, please. i can't take anymore acedemia)? i honestly want to know if i'm the only one who can't sleep at night because her mind just won't stop working. if i were religious this is when i would start praying. i say "if i were ______ this is where i would _____..." a lot, i've noticed. but i'm not those things, so i need to stop thinking about them.

i've gone way too long without a full blown mental breakdown, but i told myself i couldn't without eva here to climb the bluffs afterwards with me. i have found that the only way i can clear my head is be in a high place when it's cloudy and windy. but i hate heights.

and there in lies the problem.





wanna go on another road trip?